First breakup, and I dont know how to cope.?

So if any of you saw my post a month ago. I got broken up by my first boyfriend, fist love of over a year. he told me I changed and I upsetted him and he cant stand the worst side of me and that he thought it'd be best if we break it off now than later. and blah blah blah





went through some really tough times. probably the toughest thing I've had to go through, emotionally.





Within the first week of our breakup, he started being with another girl. They hid their ';secret relationship'; until the second week. Then they made themselves official exactly one month after the break up. The girl he's seeing now broke up with her boyfriend of two years on the same day that my ex broke up with me. They were pretty good friends already, and me ex was the first person she called after the break up. Now I guess they're in love.





Lots of people have told me to move on from this. I know this probably sounds really pathetic, but I am extremely bugged by how fast he moved on. How I suffered for so long, im still hurting, and he now ignores my existence because his new girlfriend quickly filled in the spot I took. Not only that. Lots of drama are coming from this girl.





My ex told her a lot of things about me that are really personal. Like my family problems which I only share with my closest friends. I became the center of complaints. As her best friends complained about how I was taking too long to move on. Then complaining about how I was being such a wussy for crying in school. They even discussed how they felt sorry for me because I live ';in a bad environment'; to random people.





She tells my ex how I always glare at her. And tells him that I spread rumors about him. But I dont even look at her, and I don't even want to discuss him because it hurts too bad. Now my ex hates my guts because he thinks im some malicious little thing that is always jealous.





I walk around the school and everywhere I turn I see them hugging, cuddling, kissing etc. She's in most of my classes. He will be in my class.





It hurts SO BAD to see them together, and I try sucking it up, as I should.





It sucks so bad that after all the effort and love I put in our relationship, after a billion promises and kisses, we don't even have friendship. It's fine that we ended, it just hurts to know that we ended like this....and every effort I put in to us came back as hatred.





How do I move on and just not care? Cause I really can't wrestle with all this mental torture anymore. I cant keep dwelling and thinking about it. But the whole heart healing process is taking too long. someone with words of wisdom and advice? This hurts so bad and none of my friends have gone through someone as painful.First breakup, and I dont know how to cope.?
This just makes me want to cry.


:(


I really feel for your situation, this is just so awful and sad.


If I were you, I would text your Ex boyfriend.


And tell him that you are not the one spreading the rumors, and that you would appreciate it if his new girlfriend would stop being so immature and keep you out of their conversations; and creating so much drama in your life. That you are doing your part in staying away from him, and that she needs to do the same.


Obviously she feels extremely threatened by you.


(Or else she wouldn't be making up all of these rumors to get your Ex to hate you.)


Honestly its going to keep hurting until you move on and find yourself another boy.


I know it wont be the same. But after you start dating again, it will get easy.


:))


Meet some new people.


Flirt with guys.


You are going to be okay.First breakup, and I dont know how to cope.?
Unfortunately this is normal. In every break up one person moves on quickly and the other person is left behind for a little while.





So I don't really have advice to give you...know that she's probably pissed because he talks about you too much, and he may not know it but he's actually the one ruining the relationship.





It doesn't sound like you did anything wrong, you worked so hard and had so many hopes and dreams in this...and it didn't work out. Now he's with some dramatic girl who lies and tries to make you look bad...because she's afraid of you. She's competing with your memory, which is why she tries to dig up the dirt about it.





It sounds like she's the one to feel sorry for in all of this, you on the other hand...you're free to find someone more deserving. If your ex couldn't see how hard you tried to keep the relationship alive, then that's his problem, and he's the real one missing out.





Everyone has flaws. But from the looks of it you're the real winner in this story--because you don't have to deal with some ungrateful asshat, and he's the one stuck with insecure crazy broad.


Sounds like they deserve eachother.





you on the other hand can recover by talking to your friends or family about all this...and you've gotten so used to doing a relationship with him that it's all about breaking the habit. Eventually you learn what life is like without him, and create a new routine of living life without taking him into account.





People heal at their own rates, you'll eventually just come to a moment where you decide that you just plain don't care. Don't worry what other people say, you'll get there.





By the way, do not text him or call him complaining about the new gf. You'll just look like some crazy ex that can't let things go--and in his mind you'll be everything that the ex claims.


Don't talk about him and her anymore unless you're talking to your close friends, or if someone approaches you just say ';I would rather not talk about it.';


Eventually people learn through experience that you're not the one causing problems.