How Do I Cope With My Girlfriend Being Close To Her Ex?

My Girl and I are 21 and we have dated for 6 months and it has been by far the best relationship I've been in ever. We go great together and due to family problems on her end, she lives with me. However, she is very close to her Ex boyfriend and I am very upset about it. They dated from age 14-17 and he was very abusive physically %26amp; verbally towards her, yet they have been friends for 3 years after their breakup. She tells me I am far better than he ever was and that I am the best she's ever had. She saw him for 1st time in 6 months (without me) just the other day and he text messaged her twice in the 24 hours after they hung out, for her to come back and hangout some more. Now I'm really unsure about this because I haven't met him, I've tried but he always cancels on my girlfriend and I before we meet. There are some other unearthing things that are odd to me:





- I purchased a pendant for her for Xmas, she didn't like the chain my pendant was on so she put my pendant on a chain that his family gave her.


- If he needs money 10-20 bucks for groceries, she always is okay with giving it to him.


- He needed a date to a banquet and asked my girlfriend, she said yes, but again he canceled.


- Once a week he wants her to come visit him. He always calls her at late hours drunk needing advice as he gets depressed easily. He has to go on web cam with her when he chats on MSN with her .





She became angry and distant with me just last night when I said how I felt about this situation and how it made me feel. We are about to move out of my house in 2 months and to the city where he lives and I just need a lot of advice because I'm not sure if I can cope with her going out with him all the time or having him at my new place.





To be fair, she has no feelings for him like that, they don't hug, although he has asked her before why they can't hug. I just don't know whether I should put my foot down and say ';You can talk to him on the phone or MSN, but no face-to-face'; or if I should just give up. I haven't met him like I said so how can I trust him? He asked her 2 weeks before we met if they could be ';bed buddies';, she said no but that proves to me he still thinks she is attractive and wants to have sex with her.





Sorry this was so long winded, I don't know if ever will be cool with this, I just want some other opinions because I can't throw away someone that means a lot to me, but then again with all I have stated above, maybe I'd be better off...





Some advice would greatly appreciatedHow Do I Cope With My Girlfriend Being Close To Her Ex?
You made the comment this was the best realtionship you ever had yet you are dating a woman who keeps her abussive ex in the picture.





She becomes angry and distant with you when you wanna talk about how this bothers your feelings?





Again and you say this is the best realtionship you ever had?





Let you ask you are your past realtionships even worse?





When a person becomes distant and angry when a person they should love wants to talk about there feelings this is a major red flag.





The fact she gets distant and upset means she is not only hiding something she feels pissed off when you bring it up, I would say thats because she already knows shes in the wrong and making her face what she is doing behind your back and even in your face with lies puts her in defence very fast.





I don't tend to respond to mens posts but I saw yours and new you needed as much help as anyone else.





You said this in your post - I can't throw away someone that means a lot to me .





Let you ask you what do you mean to yourself? You have allowed her and him to come before your own feelings.





Do you even understand the kinda man you are? Loving caring and loyal is very valuable to so many other great females in this world who would not be treating you in this way?





First , something is going on for a fact. Does the ex want her in a sexual way 100% YES! Does the ex want her back and very good chance yes.





Does she want him back? Or better yet is she having sex with him.





We can't be 100% sure on this one but what we can be 100% sure on is he has a major pull and hold on her and she can't seem to let go and end him in her life as she should have done.





This is a danger point for you and a big risk. You should not have to deal with this and you should put your foot down and have every right to say hes out of your life or it's over.





Him getting on cam with her not normal. There is not one thing that is right about this for your life.





You can handel this two ways, you can put up with it let her treat you anyway she likes no matter how it bothers you and over time feel more and more disrespected till you hit a bitter point..





Or you can say how you feel and demand hes out of her life or it's over. If she crys and trys to talk you out of your feelings you must respect yourself enough to not budge!





Remember your life is short stop wasting time with the wrong person when the world has a right one waiting for you to make the right choices!





I will not tell you what you want to hear I will tell you the truth!How Do I Cope With My Girlfriend Being Close To Her Ex?
Dating is an exploratory period. It's designed to determine of there's really a solid relationship. Anything is a signal of incompatibility. This sounds like a clear and loud signal.





Deal with it, or move on.