My fiance cheated on me, How do i move on and cope with this embarrassment and betrayal? Tips please :(?

i was with a guy for 3 years, for the past 2 months i lost my phone and laptop and the only time we can communicate is if i got on the computers in the house (its an LDR - long distance) and i had construction in the house for almost a month, and in that month he cheated on me. he got another gf and fell for her while still with me. things began clearing up and i was able to communicate more with him, and he was coming here in 2 weeks before i found out about the other girl.





at first, he said he will leave her, the next day i found out he never did.


then, he said he left her again, i found out he didnt.





i get so angry at her for messing with a guy who was engaged so i signed on msn and told her off for being a homewrecker (i know very immature) and she tells me this entire time he has only talked to me in fear of me killing myself, and that every single time he talked to me he would copy and paste our conversations and email it to her, and that she wont ';allow him to come visit me'; so he chose her over me obviously and we r over for good...which i am ok with considering he cheated on me





i was stupid to ever give him a 2nd r 3rd chance...when i found his fake fb with his double life on it at first i was naive enough to assume someone else was using his name and picture!! thats how much i love him and trusted him.





i got a job as a pharmacy technician and i start monday, i cant start work with my mind so occupied and feeling so hurt. this all happened this week in the course of 4 days. i feel ashamed in fron of my friends and family for wanting to marry this guy. i wanna move on as fast as he moved on and i wanna forget him like he forgot me. i wanna live and be successful and just put this all behind me.





please give me some tips, this is the first breakup i ever had and idk what to do or think. how do i cope and how can i get over it asap?My fiance cheated on me, How do i move on and cope with this embarrassment and betrayal? Tips please :(?
OK--millions of people have gone through these types of issues---YES its a shock--yes it is a betrayal---YES--its BAD. BUT--consider the facts---CHEATERS are mentally ill--simply put--he is doing these things because of deep seated psycological issues--mostly from childhood. It is almost always a classic text book case of neglect---no self respect--no integrity---no sense of ';right from wrong';---what I mean is---he has had a deep problem from something in his past--THAT YOU DID NOT SEE. IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. IT IS NOTHING THAT YOU DID. Its all his doing. There is NO reason for YOU to tolerate it and being mad is only a temporary emotional response. SO---from this moment on--YOU have to be responsible for your own life and happiness. NEVER ever give this man forgiveness--he will only do it again and again unless HE gets help identifying WHY HE is doing it. You go to your ';new job'; with a NEW outlook on life----you continue to live and find happiness for YOURSELF--without him. Write your angry feelings down on paper---I mean all of the anger--cry and scream if you must---but write it all down--then burn it!!---ITS OVER---You start every new day with a few ways to be good to yourself--go to the gym for 30 minutes every day---wash your car and make it look nice--go for a ride and see the area sights--smile and enjoy your day. Meet new people at work--NEVER MENTION HIM OR THE PAST TO ANYONE. If someone asks if you are ';single';--simply say YES--thats it!! If you get a chance to go out--go and have fun--keep it all easy ----but NEVER mention your past. IT IS OVER--you burned it and its gone. NEVER talk to him again---tell yourself you NEVER knew him. Throw all HIS crap away--all of it---bag it up and get rid of it. Clean the house--get some fresh flowers and put some music on---hop around and have some fun!! NEVER think of him again. ITS NOT YOUR FAULT. Save a few bucks from each paycheck---save up for a vacation. BE GOOD TO YOURSELF--this was NOT your fault. Throw his crap away NOW--burn your angry thoughts---then wake up tomorrow and go out for coffee and a sweet treat--smile and have some fun !! Go to this job and work hard--then play hard after work. NONE OF THIS WAS YOUR FAULT. When you decide to date again---consider this adage--CLOSE ONE DOOR BEFORE YOU OPEN ANOTHER. Date a new man and enjoy yourself---and allow him to exhibit his true inner self. Not all men are cheaters. Don't be fearful of every man. Forget the louse and move on!!PLEASE--be at peace--smile--relax---GOOD LUCK TO YOU.My fiance cheated on me, How do i move on and cope with this embarrassment and betrayal? Tips please :(?
A few things - get the book ';His Needs - Her Needs'; (W. Harley) and you will see WHY everything got all messed up.


Second, you might consider doing DivorceCare. This 13 weeks will bring you to understand much about interpersonal relationships that you obviously do not understand now.
why are you ashamed of his low down, double-life, deceitful ways?


At least you found out before you married him.





Learn from your mistakes, and next time don't be so forgiving!
You just move on!
I am glad you have the brains to move on, and get rid of him. He would just continue to hurt you. You weren't naive, he LIED to you, and tricked you. It was Him, not you. You are smart, and with time, you can move on. Never, Ever be ashamed or embarrassed, HE was the cheater, you did Nothing wrong.
Just know you will get over him. You said your starting a new job monday, that is good. Try to focus on your job and you will forget about him. Every day will get easier. You deserve better!
pull you self together and learn from this yes it will take time to get over a broken heart but you have to move on fine a friend to take your mind off of this loser and before you know it you will be over him


like yesterday
We all have people in our lives who disappoint us. You are lucky in many ways because you found out what a jerk this guy was before you married him. There's no shame there. His behavior reflects on him, not you. You are the victim here and the winner, as well. Good for you for having gotten a good job. You have a new life in front of you. You'll do fine. You'll be surprised how well you will do in life. Just hang in there. Good luck.
First of all, he didn't cheat on you. He is cheating himself, he is untrustworthy and his new girl friend will experience this first hand some day. As for her hanging out with him, he may not have been upfront with her about your relationship from the start. Time will show them what kind of person he really is. Yes, it hurts and good people shouldn't have hurt like that. It's really a good thing you found out now instead of later. If you had children or a house to divide up. I know I'm sounding heartless, but I have been through it myself.





It is hard to see how self destructive his behavior is at this time in your life. Someday you will understand what I'm saying. His true character sank his boat not the other girl. Someday she may be just as hurt by his behavior, or she might hurt him. Go on and have a better life, your going to have some bad days. Keep this in mind, your ok he is the one with the problem.
I'm so sorry for what you went through! Be glad you didn't marry the cheater! It could of been worst!


Feel sorry for the other girl because she will be cheated on! Mark my words...what goes around comes right back to bite them in the ***.


What a jerk, but to find out now then later. He is the type who could never be satisfied with just one person. He is a compulsive cheater and he will keep on doing it.


Good riddance!


Hold your head up high and don't let anything get you down! It's not you, but him that has a problem.
It is difficult to continue on with life after such a hard break up. You obviously loved him very much.





Don't be embarrassed. This has happened to all of us. We feel your pain. Don't be embarrassed--you didn't marry this loser! THAT would have been embarrassing!





Congratulations on your new job. Don't let your ex rob you of this valuable career opportunity. Look at it as a fresh start--and something to focus on to take you mind off of your heartbreak. Don't jeopardize your future with self pity. You have a lot going for you. Be good to yourself and focus on the positive.





Good luck!
You gotta learn how to value yourself more highly. You don't truly feel you deserve better, otherwise you'd simply not be interested in this person any longer after he pulled the crap he's pulled.





Think about it like a job offer. If you were offered a job at McDonald's cleaning floors, would you take it? I'm guessing no. Why? Because you know you can have a job as a pharmacy technician. You're ';better'; than the Mickey D's job. You know you can do better.





This guy is like Mickey D's. The problem is, you're not realizing you can land the pharmacy tech job (i.e. a better guy who'll treat you the way you want to be treated).
First you have to look on the bright side of things!


It's better you found out now that he's a cheater than after you were married.


He was engaged to you and got involved with someone else, his word was no good.


Your friends and family still love you and want the very best for you.


Having a little egg on your face is still better than having aids which is probably what his new girlfriend will get if he don't change his ways.


Count your blessings that he's gone and just into your new job, you'll find a new guy and realize that this actually worked out in your favor!